Cathleen O'Connor
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Nightmares and Other Thoughts

11/1/2021

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"In dreams we enter a world that is entirely our own." ~~Harry Potter's Aldus Dumbledore

Last night tricks and treats abounded and scary movies filled the schedule in theaters and on the television. Today is the day after - all Saints Day but I am thinking about the Eve - All Souls or Halloween.

When I was eleven a movie called 13 Ghosts came out right around Halloween. Back in the days before special effects had the sophistication they do now, this movie had a special marketing hook. Each person was given a viewer with two cellophane viewing panels - one red and the other blue. If you looked through the blue panel, you didn't see the ghosts. But, if you looked through the red panel the ghosts appeared.

I remember being too afraid to look through the red panel. I'd build up the courage to glance for a second through the red panel, gripping my friend's hand so tightly I stopped her circulation, and then I'd be right back to the safety of the ghost free film. As a child, my imagination was always on overdrive.

That same imagination serves me well today as a writer, but I'm still not given to going to horror movies or reading the really diabolical stories that are so popular. After all, I often find the reality of life troubling these days so why get wrapped up in fearful illusions made by others. The nightmares I have these days are the ones that well up from within my own being.

In dreams, I view nightmares as my psyche working to release anxieties that have built up during the day. I can't say I enjoy them but they no longer scare me. Instead I am grateful that there is a marvelous mechanism of the dreaming mind that allows my psyche to balance itself at night. And, often, once I analyze the nightmare, I find exactly what worry has been preying on my sense of peace. And once it is discovered, I can address it. No longer unconscious, its power wilts and withers away.

The season of fall is about letting go and releasing to prepare for going within to plant the seeds for the next spring. The harvest is almost complete, soon to be celebrated and enjoyed, but the turn to the darkness brings with it thoughts that still unnerve. The ancient Celts believed that the veil between the worlds was thinnest at the time of Samhain (All Hallows Eve) as the connection to the ancestors was at its highest.

“Practically, a besom [broom] is used at Samhain to sweep away the last of the autumn leaves; but its also used to ritually sweep out old energy and create space for the new.”~~author, Lisa Lister

I invite you this week to embrace your dreams, whether nightmares or not, and to consciously welcome the energy of the next season by using these last few weeks of autumn to release what no longer serves you. Work with your intuition and heightened connection to Divine love to align your energy with that of the natural cycles.

And try not to eat all the leftover candy.

With love,
 
Cathleen

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Where Things Are

3/7/2021

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I have been cleaning up my office and looking for important pieces of paper that I'll need to file my 2020 taxes. I have an aversion to filing that comes from my orientation as a visual person. Once I file something, it literally ceases to exist for me.
 
You can see my problem.
 
A few years ago, with the help of a professional organizer, I set up a visual system to manage my files and never-ending explosion of paper. It works . . . up to a point. I have a large cabinet in my office area with open cubicles, some of them labeled, where I toss my important papers. Then I rummage through the cubicles when I need to find one of those papers. What I'm looking for often ends up not in the cubicle labeled for that exact item. My system works . . . up to a point.
 
And that is just with physical files - digital files are another story entirely. Digitally I am more organized with many digital folders and lists that keep my online world functioning.
 
But my digital system has its own Achilles heel.
 
The digital world expands as much as I need it to. So where I de-clutter in my physical world, my digital world just keeps getting bigger and I never seem to go back and delete the files and folders no longer needed. I only add to what is already there and I am rapidly reaching my point of overwhelm when I have to do endless scrolling just to get to a folder I need.
 
De-cluttering your physical and digital worlds is an important part of becoming clear and of being able to focus on what is truly important to you. It is part of the spiritual process of manifestation. You clear space to let in something new. And that is true whether what is cluttering your life is in your closet, your office, or in your computer. And to clear space you have to know where things are.
 
When I used to travel for long periods of time in my corporate job, I would take my few pieces of good jewelry and hide them somewhere in my apartment, just in case someone broke in while I was away. Usually it would take me a few weeks once I returned home to find where I hid my stuff. It turns out I was great at hiding my stuff from myself. I'm sure burglars would have found my stuff in no time.
 
Hence the need for knowing where things are. I have to acknowledge and thank my cousin Helene for the inspiration and title of this week's newsletter. Like me, Helene is a visually oriented person. In her attempts to organize her physical space, she created a digital folder titled WHERE THINGS ARE. 
 
A great idea! Finally, a place to put a list of all the stuff that you are trying to keep track of that you might not be able to find. Unfortunately, for Helene, when she went to look in her WHERE THINGS ARE folder to find something important, it was empty. For Helene, and clearly for me as well, where things are remains a mystery.

This week I received a shipment of little tags that you can put on your keys, your glasses or anything that you have a tendency to put down and lose. With these magical little tags, I can track them with my phone. If only I knew where my phone was right now. This is the reason I keep my landline - so I can call my cell phone when it wanders away.

Spring is almost upon us - the perfect time to solve the mystery of where things are and to make space for more things just waiting to arrive. I'd love to hear some of your stories and any fabulous ideas to help me better organize my space. Remember . . . 

“You don’t have to face every skeleton in your closet before you can make some room in there!” ~~Carmen Klassen, Love Your Clutter Away
 
Click on COMMENTS at the top of this piece and give me your best! If you email them to me . . . well, I think we all know what their fate will be.
 

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Setting Yourself Free

3/4/2021

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Peace dwells within when the mind and heart are free of expectations.

You know you have expectations. You have expectations of yourself and who you need to be; expectations of others and how they need to behave; expectations of how society should function; expectations of what it means to be a spiritually aware person in a not-so-spiritual world. 
 
However, the fewer expectations you have, the greater the possibility to live in the moment and to live in balance. Is it truly possible to let go of expectations? It may not be easy, but it is worth it.
 
Expectations take you out of the present and into the past and future. Into the past because your expectations formed in childhood in your original family and through the authority figures that influenced your perceptions and understanding of how you "should" be.

Into the future because expectations can paralyze you from moving forward if you are unsure of what it requires for you to be successful - in love, in work, even in learning how to meditate.
 
Notice the expectations that you carry with you throughout the day. You'll have plenty of opportunities to do so. You'll notice these expectations standing in the supermarket, waiting for your spouse to take out the trash, waiting for appreciation for all that you do and even when you are trying to quiet your mind and someone (who is that anyway?) keeps running a list of "shoulds" and "have to's" through your mental space.
 
“Live your life, sing your song. Not full of expectations. Not for the ovations. But for the joy of it.” ~~~Author, Rasheed Ogunlaru

I am a creative person, yet I could not write a word if I had expectations of how my writing would be received. I wouldn't be able to be in the joy of the creative moment.

And it isn't just creativity that suffers under the weight of expectations. Your authentic soul-self does as well. If you must expect something, expect that you are an inherently fallible being here to learn and experience all that life offers. And that this is a beautiful thing.

I invite you to set yourself free and let go of expectations. Let all that you are be enough.
 
With love,
 
Cathleen

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What Does it Mean to Be the light?

2/8/2021

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"Nothing can dim the light that shines from within. " ~~Maya Angelou

I took the photo shown here on a Sunday night. After a cold day of steadily falling snow, a magnificent sunset ended the day in beauty, light and warmth.

Quantum Physics tells us that we are made of the same stuff as the stars - and that light infuses and connects all in the universe. But what does it mean to be the light?

For me, there are two aspects, one inward and one outward.

Within is what might be called lightness of being - this is what happens when you live in alignment with your values - when your heart is open to love and compassion. In that state, the density of the physical body shifts and energy and vitality emerge.

The other aspect is outward - the ability to send light out into the world. With the mind and heart you can send light to every aspect of creation - to the plant world, to the earth, to the animal kingdom, and to the human family. Every time you show kindness, you are sending out the light. Every time you express gratitude, you are sending out the light. Every time you listen to another with love and compassion, you are sending out the light.

Of course, the two aspects are interconnected. First you must embody the light, be loving of who you are, grateful for the blessings and challenges you face, open and honest in sharing your gifts and talents. Lightness of being happens through open-hearted self-acceptance. And when you embody that state of being, the light within becomes visible to all.

It is as Mahatma Ghandi said, "If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him… We need not wait to see what others do."

I invite you to join me in focusing on the light within. Together we can hold a vision of a world where the light truly illuminates the darkness. Like millions of stars in the night sky, the human family can use light to transform our collective experience.

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Using Writing to Heal

6/28/2020

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"Through writing, we walk out of the darkness into the light together, one small step at a time." ~~C. J. Heck, poet and writer
    
Writing is a wonderful medium available to anyone interested in exploring the world within and without. And it is especially effective as a tool to uncover beliefs, fears and behaviors that may be preventing you from breaking through to the fullest expression of your gifts and talents. Writing can also help heal.
  
Writing can help heal not only you, the individual, but also the larger human family of which you are a part. There is something about the connection of brain to hand to heart that makes tangible what otherwise might stay hidden.
  
The human experience comes with doubts, fears, anxieties, past experiences, future dreams, complicated relationships and whatever internal dialogue you have - positive or negative.

I know friends who started writing poetry during the imposed quarantine of the pandemic. Others are writing now after the events following the murder of George Floyd. Whether you are writing for yourself or others, you are using a method that makes seen what might have previously been unseen, and that opportunity for self-expression shines light into the dark corners of your being.

Writing has the power to transport you to other worlds - within and without. Journaling or writing through meditative practice opens doors to the psyche and the connection to that which is the higher mind. Writing can change your perspective, help you make sense of the senseless, deal with fear of the unknown and re-discover who you truly are.

I'm inviting you this week to do some writing - write a letter to an old friend, write a list of things you want to do when you can freely move about in society again, write the changes you would like to see in our society that could bring peace and justice and explore how that could happen.
 
If you are struggling with a particular emotion, write about it. If you are upset with someone in your life, write a dialogue with them so you can briefly stand in the other person's shoes and gain perspective. If you are feeling lonely, write yourself a love letter - shower yourself with all the blessings you would bestow on the most cherished of friends.

Sometimes there is not a lot you can do to change a situation, but you can get in touch with your own heart and share your words. Writing, like all art forms, brings you into presence, and from that place of presence, healing happens.

Stay well. Stay safe.

With Love,

Cathleen

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Change is Coming

6/14/2020

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"Love is an expression of power. We can use it to transform our world."
~~~ Ericka Huggins, Activist and Educator
    
These last two weeks have been reminders about what it means to be human; what it means to witness the highest expression of love, connection and compassion, and the lowest of violence, hate and fear.
  
Together we witnessed unfathomable cruelty in the murder of George Floyd, resulting in an explosion of grief and rage that swept through our hearts, our communities, our cities, our country and the world. And, yet, today as I write, I have hope. I see change coming. And that is a good thing.

For too long we have lived with an illusion that we are all separate. Then, along came a pandemic, bringing us back into the reality that we are one human family and that what happens to one of us ripples around the globe. And now that same human family is poised to move together on a long-delayed path of social justice and change.

Such change can only happen when the people are ready to move; when the people, not any one government, have decided the time for change is now; when the people want the country to reflect who they truly are, and remember the power there is in shared ideals, the power there is in truly caring for one another with compassion and kindness.

We can't escape the ripples over time of wrongs of the past. At some point those ripples reach critical mass and a wave begins. At some point the waves reach unprecedented heights and a new path is carved upon the earth. This is where we are now - standing at the edge of a new path - one we may not walk down but our children will, and our children's children.
 
So, yes, I have hope. And I invite you to look into your heart and decide how you best want to use your energy during this time. If you are called to protest, then protest. If you are called to write or make art, then write and make art. Whatever you are called to do, I invite you to do so with compassion and love.

Stay well. Stay safe.

With Love,

Cathleen
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Opening Up

6/14/2020

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"It is exhausting, all this opening up."
~~~ Nitya Prakash, author and film maker. 
    
I know just how he feels. There's a lot of talk today about opening up as communities, towns and cities begin to emerge from the quarantine of COVID-19. 
  
And, of course that gets me thinking about what opening up means in the larger, personal sense. As I emerge into a world where I'm still six-feet apart from you behind a mask, will I be able to open my heart? Does the physical distance create an emotional one?
  
I don't have the answers but I know that in order to open up - to be vulnerable - you, and I, need to let go of past experiences of hurt, grief, loss and fear. And right now, those experiences are not in the distant past, but in the recent present. Right now, you might be worrying about an uncertain future, about how you will support yourself financially, about whether or not you will be safe and well.

This week, in this time of opening up, I invite you to step into your power - to love and accept all of you - your impatience, your anger, your sadness and your fears. This week work with what you have to make the best of the moments ahead.
 
You may feel space opening up inside that you hadn't even realized was tight and constrained. Your power (your empowerment) is in the choices you make each day: in the thoughts you give energy to, in the emotions you focus on, in the actions you take.

Opening up requires gentleness. Be gentle with yourself and others this week as you navigate your next steps. Find what is true for you and let that be your guide.
 
Stay well. Stay safe.

With Love,

Cathleen
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Acceptance

6/7/2020

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"Acceptance is the currency of love."
~~~ Teal Swan 
    
Painful life experiences can get stuck in the mind and heart. You most likely never ask yourself 'why did I have such a good time at that party?' No, the 'whys' that get stuck in your mind and heart aren't those experiences. Those experiences are just taken as they come - no explanation needed.
 
Right now is a time that will at some point move into the past as a possibly fearful and painful experience. But it is up to you whether it gets stuck in your mind and heart in such a way that it colors your present and your ability to feel alive and joyful.  You no more live in the past than you live in a day yet to be born. But if you keep your mind and heart turned towards the past trying to undo what you might see as painful experiences, then you lose your ability to move forward. 
 
So, what is the way forward? 
 
The only way forward is acceptance. Acceptance says what happened, happened. It cannot be undone. Feel it, grieve it, acknowledge it and then let it go. This is especially important when dealing prolonged, stressful situations like the one we are experiencing now. Acceptance doesn't change the situation but it does move you out of worry and anxiety and into a place of peace.
 
Acceptance means you wear a face mask if that is what is advised so you keep not only yourself but others well. Acceptance means you find moments of connection in new ways with family and friends. Acceptance means that you recognize where your true power resides - in your ability not to control what happens but to control how you respond to it.
 
I invite you this week to move into the present through acceptance of all that has come before. Bless it, feel it, grieve it if you still have not done that, and then let it go into the ether. Breathe in a new day - it is one of the great spiritual mysteries and truths that you are born again each day. Harness that energy for just one day - find the gifts that hide within the energy of acceptance - gifts of love and peace.
 
Stay well. Stay safe.

With Love,

Cathleen
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Transformation

5/17/2020

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"Transformation is a journey without a final destination.."
~~~ Marilyn Ferguson 
    
Author Marilyn Ferguson was known as the Apostle of the New Age, envisioning Aquarian ideals and fulfillment of human potential long before such ideas and possibilities became mainstream.
  
Transformation is always happening in the present and it is rarely comfortable. I think of transformation as a process of puzzle pieces clicking together in new ways to create something that turns the status quo on its head. Something that was not even in our range of vision becomes a vital part of the new picture emerging.

In the collective and personal transformations we are going through right now, the final destination is unknowable, because as you and I transform, the puzzle pieces keep transforming right along with us.

Together we watch as a virus, one of nature's most effective agents of transformation, demonstrates the unknowable process of change. Such transformation, rapid and not well understood, is frightening, especially when the results can be deadly. But, even if you (and I) don't get sick in this Pandemic, we are still going through a very personal process of transformation - of trying to envision a 'new' normal for daily life.

There is a secret to feeling safe while in the process. That secret is to stay within the boundaries of a day, each day. Let your mind not wander to the future and become anxious about what might happen next. Instead stay within the bounds of the day you are given and see what is already changing for you.

You can allow different layers of self to emerge gently. Being gentle with yourself when in a process of transformation is key. Patience and gentleness. You wouldn't express frustration, fear and anger at a flower in the process of opening. Don't do so with yourself and others.

Be patient. Be gentle. Be kind. To self first, honoring the Divine spark. And then to all, including our beautiful mother earth. 

Stay well. Stay safe.

With Love,

Cathleen
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What's On My Mind

5/3/2020

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"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most." ~~Ozzy Osbourne 

My mind is up to interesting stuff. Without as many distractions as before, it flits around thinking about COVID-19 to what I'm going to eat for lunch or dinner to figuring out what day it is. And that's just when I first get up!

By mid-day my mind wants to take a break and my body wants to get up and stop working on the computer and breathe in some fresh air. One thing my mind seems to want to do is immerse itself in all things health-related. I signed up to take an online course with Acupuncturist David Crow about botanical antiviral formulas to strengthen my immune system. And I've been taking a homeopathic remedy recommended by my homeopath as a preventative.

But I'm interested in more than just holistic preparations that might be good for me to use right now. I've also signed up for classes to move my body and classes in art and creative writing. 

I know you are thinking I am on online overload, and you may be right. But it is rare I have the time in my daily life to take a lot of programs that sound interesting and valuable to me. So, I'm following my mind along this path of healing that seems to be my major focus.

In this time where there is little I (or you) can do to make known the unknown, learning is one of those activities that moves the mind away from worry and stressful thoughts and into a place of receptivity. So, for me I've decided to keep learning.

Whatever your mind finds interesting, look for courses or programs being offered that might speak to those topics. One friend is taking an online course on Scottish clans (perhaps she is watching Outlander right now?). Another friend just mentioned that she is hooked on a course in French cuisine. I can't wait to be join her for dinner once that is possible.

I invite you this week to explore learning that either engages your mind or allays your fears or educates you on health and keeping yourself as healthy as possible. Whatever you learn will serve you well as together we re-emerge from this time.

Stay in. Stay well. Stay safe.

With Love,

Cathleen
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    Cathleen O' Connor

    Writer, speaker, teacher, coach and intuitive.

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